Friday, May 4, 2012

BRINGING HOME THE BACON


It's cloudy and a bit cooler than it has been the past couple of days. Rain is predicted later on, to continue throughout the night. With luck I'll be able to get my few errands taken care of before the showers begin.

An hour ago I sat awhile at the picnic table overlooking the river at the far corner of the yard. I was hoping to get a shot of the oriole that's been lurking hereabouts since daybreak. Naturally, the oriole was nowhere to be seen once I'd decided to make his portrait. But a hard-working robin was busy bring home the bacon—or in his case, the worms—to his mate doing nest duties in the pine and cedar thicket nearby. 

I have a column on deadline that needs writing and sending in. But for a variety of reasons I can't seem to get myself settled enough to work. Usually there's no problem—I sit at the desk, fire up the word processor with my column draft template…and start pecking away. In an hour or two—sometimes six or eight—the piece is done. I edit, give it a rest—say another hour—then edit a final time and zap the piece off to whatever publication.

Not today—or at least not this morning. While, I don't do this sort of thing often, when it happens I know myself well enough to realize it's simply best to give myself time—get out and about, take the edge off the high nervous energy level. 

I should also say this is not a case of the oft-mentioned "writer's block," that complete inability to work, which has crippled more than a few of my writer friends. I've never suffered that disabling malady—probably because I'm too much of an Irish motormouth. 

And truth be told, I could make this happen if I wanted/needed to; I have before, on numerous occasions. It isn't fun. I've sat at the desk upwards of twenty-four hours straight hammering out a piece that would normally have taken no more than two to get done. Moreover, if you're conscientious, honest with your self-judgement, and have the energy and bull-headedness sufficient to hold out until the job is done, the quality of the work isn't usually compromised. But forcing words and making them come reasonably well is akin to sweating blood. 

Better to take the edge off and settle down some other way. To let the flow come naturally, in its own good time. Luckily I have the time, even with the deadline, to allow for such a luxury. Then, like that robin I watched earlier, I can write my piece, send it off, and thus do my own rendition of bringing home the bacon. 
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9 comments:

Gail said...

Hi Grizz - the ease of your style is such a simple and yet profound blessing. I do appreciate your life style very much.
Love Gail
peace.......

Grizz………… said...

Gail…

What you see (read) and what I feel are often at two ends of an emotional pole—though I do try and polish the rough edges and finish up with something casual and simple, laid-back. And I try to live my life the same way—open, honest, casual…except the doing gets pretty complex sometimes. I'm as mystified, terrified, worried, childish, and foolish when it comes to daily matters as the next guy, maybe more so. I hope some of that comes through, too.

bonifer said...

I am with Gail on this one, Grizz, I enjoy your style and honesty, and of course your pics, your blog is a breathe of fresh air...
hope all is well on the health end too...

Grizz………… said...

Bonifer…

Thank you all around—I sincerely appreciate every comment. I truly enjoy doing this blog because of the folks I meet and get to know. I think I have the best readers out there.

Unfortunately, all is not well on the health front…but the good news is that it's more or less fixable. I have a doctor's appointment Monday and will know more of the details.

Gail said...

Grizz - oh my, yes. I did not mean to imply that you are on the surface or w/out challenge and deep emotion - quite the opposite actually. I full well know and admire the way you meet all of life's challenges. I was reacting more to the nature that surrounds you and that you live by and with and that it calms you and how you immerse yourself in the balance of nature's harmony. I am so aware of how you manage this in spite of life's demands and furys- I know that you feel deeply not only for yourself and what you face but for all those in your world. The ease of your life style of which I spoke is about nature and harmony which you strive to manage/maintain and be a part of despite the some times uphill rocky road ahead. I am sorry if I offended you in anyway.
Loving you
Gail
peace......

Gail said...

p.s. please let me know the outcomes to your doctor appt on Monday - well, as much as you feel ok to disclose. I am praying for you Grizz.

Grizz………… said...

Gailx2…

Dear Lord! You DID NOT offend me in any way. Chill. We're friends, right? I'm not going to get offended nearly that easily—though I didn't think what you thought I thought about what you said. (Now that was clear, huh?)

I was simply trying (and failing, obviously) to say my relaxed style of writing and living should not be taken to mean I'm wiser or more in charge of things than the next guy. Or more relaxed. Not even when it comes to nature…maybe especially when it comes to nature.

I'm quirky, can tend toward the irascible and curmudgeonly, am decidedly bullheaded, incorrigible, and Irish (which probably makes all those other adjectives redundant), and as independent as a hog on ice. A really strong mix of artistic and logical temperaments which infuriates even me sometimes.

But the other side is that I've been through so much in my life, faced so many battles and disappoints and hardships…made so many, many mistakes, that not much fazes me. I'm secure in my faith and belief, comforted by love and friendship, and long ago came to terms with my own mortality.

None of which, BTW, can always prevent that sleepless night of worry, bouts of sadness and despair that wash over me like an ocean, or fear so great that I want to crawl in a hole and pull the earth in behind me.

I simply do the best I can on a given day. Not noble, just snuffling along upstream and trying not to show my teeth too often.

P.S. I will tell you the deal when I know the details.

Gail said...

HI GRIZZ - I hear you, I DO! And I love your brutal honesty and self proclamations - every criticism and every applause and wonder. You are real! Thank you my friend, thank you
Love Gail
peace and high regard.

Grizz………… said...

Gail…

Sheeseeh…glad we got that settled!

{:~)